Feel guilt about Jack being so upset & me getting mad at him for all the performance & all that yesterday… sigh…

What can you do? He wants everybody so much at the moment. He dashed back to the window when Louise’s mum went home yesterday – knelt on the windowsill to see her disappearing down the street & it upset him – just a little cry before tea. He just wants everyone to be there all the time. An ambition that he will never realise, & an emotional break he is going to have to learn to deal with.

Louise was feeling guilty as well. She thought that they were going to have to go to the dentists yesterday. Jack had an appointment, but the days got mixed up & he had already missed it. From gearing him up to going, he suddenly wasn’t – so there was no being picked up from school early to go to the dentists for Jack, & she had to tell him that. He must have taken it reasonably well, but when at school it sounds like he just mooched off to play with the jigsaws in the class on his own. Must have been quite forlorn as Louise said that it upset her that he was plainly unhappy.

It also struck how restrictive the play is at school. At the moment it’s all letters & little else. There’s none of the creative freedom of a playgroup where you had a lot more choice over what you could do & there was just painting for the sake of painting & playing (sandpit – water etc) for the joy of playing. This is how it is with school though. I guess… & will continue to be. I guess you realise how young they are all over again.